My Daughter, The Teenager



Just typing those words makes me uneasy and a bit sad. When did my little girl become a teenager? How did this happen so quickly and so covertly?

But more importantly, how do I handle being a mom of a teenage girl and doing a good job of it? Some say it can't be done. Mothers and teen girls are just meant to not get along--it is written in the cards, as they say.


I am determined to do this teenage thing with her successfully though. But I am scared, what if I fail? What if I fail her?

I worry constantly about her now. I always have, of course, since the day I held in my arms for the first time. She  was then and has always been, fiercely independent. I love this about her, and I am nervous for her because of it.

It is hard to get her to listen to and take advice from me or her dad because of her independent nature. She is less likely to compromise because of this quality.

But I hope this characteristic of her personality will also keep her from being easily persuaded by her peers as she gets older and spends more time away from my protective arms (shudder).

I still see so much little girl in her, she is after all, 13, not 16. I want to reach out and grab that little girl that sneaks out once in awhile, and hold her close. I see it in her smile when she talks about her latest crush, Justin Bieber. I see it in her face when she finds out I am taking her shopping for new clothes. I hear it when she is in her room giggling with her best friend. And it warms my heart. And it makes me sad for I know tides are turning.

I see the teenager coming out in her when I catch her looking in the mirror at herself, and not looking happy with the reflection she sees back. I hear it in her voice when she argues with me about school work not interfering with cheer-leading  (though my point was that cheer-leading was interfering with her school work. See what I mean?) I see the teenage girl in my daughter when she wants the latest issue of Seventeen Magazine, and privacy. LOTS OF PRIVACY.

I am worried about the boys. Not my boys, the other boys that will be coming around soon. I am worried about peer influence, drugs, sex, and boys. I am so scared she will be hurt, confused, and will not come to me for advice as she becomes more a teenager and less a little girl. And the boys. Did I mention I am worried about the boys?

I want to hold her tight and not let go until she is, say, about 25. Is that possible?

My daughter, the teenager.

Are you the mom of a teenage girl? How are you handling it?